Sometimes you will have feelings that you may find kind of "ugly": an uncharitable grudge, taking bigoted offense at something, etc.

Those feelings are real too. They don't make you evil, but they may alert you to areas where you need to grow or change.

Sometimes a feeling that we KNOW is unjustified but still feel intensely is actually a flag to let you know, "hey, there is something here you need to deal with."

Emotions aren't good or bad. The question is what you do with them.

Christians always told me evil starts in the heart so I needed to be able to control my emotions & shut down "bad" feelings.

That is not fucking helpful. You will never be safe to get curious & explore what you are feeling & why if you are just going "bad emotion, make it stop."

You can shape your emotional landscape. You can feed & nurture the things you want to feel. You can try to get to the root of what causes the feelings that distress you. But you can't just take over control.

None of us control the things we feel. We can't. Nor should we try to.

Emotions are—among other things—a warning system. They draw our attention to things we need to sort out or deal with. They alert us to all kinds of things.

Sure, stability is nice, but you should not want to *control* your emotions. You need that system to function. Sometimes the system needs repairing. Trauma especially can cause calibration issues. But it's still an important part of you that helps keep you safe.

Christians always told me evil starts in the heart so I needed to be able to control my emotions & shut down “bad” feelings.

This explains so much about North America today.