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  3. I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

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  • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

    I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

    It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

    I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

    Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

    Rosy MathsR This user is from outside of this forum
    Rosy MathsR This user is from outside of this forum
    Rosy Maths
    wrote last edited by
    #23

    @vkc @afewbugs That sucks so badly. It's why I never tried to build any kind of following while I worked in tech - whereas I feel safer speaking as a teacher. It's just too dangerous being a very visible woman in tech. ๐Ÿ˜”.
    I'm sure there are other industries with equally misogynistic people, but tech seems particularly bad.

    1 Reply Last reply
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    • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

      What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

      I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

      Alison WilderA This user is from outside of this forum
      Alison WilderA This user is from outside of this forum
      Alison Wilder
      wrote last edited by
      #24

      @vkc i've had a couple of posts blow up to genuinely large levels and have seen what you mean with the vile stuff. Makes me wonder if social media is a good idea at all.

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

        What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

        I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

        SashinS This user is from outside of this forum
        SashinS This user is from outside of this forum
        Sashin
        wrote last edited by
        #25

        @vkc How would you feel about sharing the really bad stuff too but with clear content warnings?

        Veronica ExplainsV 1 Reply Last reply
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        • SashinS Sashin

          @vkc How would you feel about sharing the really bad stuff too but with clear content warnings?

          Veronica ExplainsV This user is from outside of this forum
          Veronica ExplainsV This user is from outside of this forum
          Veronica Explains
          wrote last edited by
          #26

          @sashin I get things that are illegal if I retransmit them

          SashinS BredrollB toadjauneT 3 Replies Last reply
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          • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

            @sashin I get things that are illegal if I retransmit them

            SashinS This user is from outside of this forum
            SashinS This user is from outside of this forum
            Sashin
            wrote last edited by
            #27

            @vkc I'm sorry you have to go through that.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

              What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

              I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

              shadowwwindS This user is from outside of this forum
              shadowwwindS This user is from outside of this forum
              shadowwwind
              wrote last edited by
              #28

              @vkc hey, thank you for posting here, I rediscovered your channel because of your Mastodon posts.

              For me the moderation is a big reason to be on a managed instance

              Question I had but reading your other comments suggests the answer ;D :
              One thing I wondered, did your mastodon experience change when you moved from a moderated instance to your own?

              dpflugD 1 Reply Last reply
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              • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

                I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

                JรฉjรฉM This user is from outside of this forum
                JรฉjรฉM This user is from outside of this forum
                Jรฉjรฉ
                wrote last edited by
                #29

                @vkc sorry about all that crap. Some people are using their anonymity to reveal their real nature that can be awful. And because they may read you every day, they think they know you intimately so they suppose they're allowed to tell you anything they want. That's difficult to ignore these haters when you're their target. I hope you'll be able to get over it.

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                  I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                  It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                  I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                  Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                  C SC This user is from outside of this forum
                  C SC This user is from outside of this forum
                  C S
                  wrote last edited by
                  #30

                  @vkc I'm sorry about how Fedi is treating you. I sometimes forget that my own Fedi bubble is benign not because Fedi as a whole is benign, but because I put in the effort to aggressively block any content I don't like, *and* I don't have a visible enough presence that would encourage the undesirables to circumvent my block list.

                  Social media can be garbage, and if you do need a break I will be sad because I enjoy your content, but please do put your own mental health first if you need to.

                  Best wishes...

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                    I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                    It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                    I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                    Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                    DexT This user is from outside of this forum
                    DexT This user is from outside of this forum
                    Dex
                    wrote last edited by
                    #31

                    @vkc Thanks for speaking openly about this, Veronica. I cannot fully understand your situation, but I can relate to being harassed in an invisible way and I wouldn't wish that on anyone else. I wouldn't want to see you leave Fedi, but I also wouldn't blame you if you did.

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                      When people say "Veronica loves the Fediverse", they remove my agency from this place. I'm a character. They're the narrator. I don't like that.

                      I think for a lot of folks, Fedi is sweet. It's quiet. It's slow. But for many, many, many of us, it's this slow-rolling insanity machine where you see the WORST THINGS and nobody else does.

                      And to be frank and clear, I'm just talking about things from my white US perspective. I don't even get the worst of it, and I recognize that.

                      dlaroeD This user is from outside of this forum
                      dlaroeD This user is from outside of this forum
                      dlaroe
                      wrote last edited by
                      #32

                      @vkc

                      You are surely frank and clear.

                      You sharing stuff like this is really valuable to me as a white, cisgendered, heterosexual, male, with a low volume account. My privileges stack in such a way that I see none of the bad actor interactions you do.

                      Thank you for sharing what those who aren't even the worst of us in the Fediverse are doing so we all can know at least that much.

                      1 Reply Last reply
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                      • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                        @McNeely I think it's unique to decentralization. If your instance blocked a baddie before they post in my replies, you don't see it and I do. In centralized social media, a mass of reports is enough to ban an account and get their posts mass-deleted. That just can't happen here.

                        Shadow GliderS This user is from outside of this forum
                        Shadow GliderS This user is from outside of this forum
                        Shadow Glider
                        wrote last edited by
                        #33

                        @vkc @McNeely Perhaps reports could be federated and an instance can set it so that if an account has over a certain amount of reports posts/replies have to be manually approved?

                        Not sure how much this would help but it feels like it could help somewhat, obvs if this is a bad idea please tell me

                        BredrollB 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                          I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                          It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                          I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                          Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                          ClassWarioC This user is from outside of this forum
                          ClassWarioC This user is from outside of this forum
                          ClassWario
                          wrote last edited by
                          #34

                          @vkc This platform needs more editing (and anger) aimed at it. This is my third account because I get frustrated at what it is (then come back here for what it should be).

                          1 Reply Last reply
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                          • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                            @sashin I get things that are illegal if I retransmit them

                            BredrollB This user is from outside of this forum
                            BredrollB This user is from outside of this forum
                            Bredroll
                            wrote last edited by
                            #35

                            @vkc @sashin i wonder if fedi has a community block list feature

                            Ner ๐Ÿ•ฏ๏ธN 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • Shadow GliderS Shadow Glider

                              @vkc @McNeely Perhaps reports could be federated and an instance can set it so that if an account has over a certain amount of reports posts/replies have to be manually approved?

                              Not sure how much this would help but it feels like it could help somewhat, obvs if this is a bad idea please tell me

                              BredrollB This user is from outside of this forum
                              BredrollB This user is from outside of this forum
                              Bredroll
                              wrote last edited by
                              #36

                              @Shadow_Glider @vkc @McNeely i do wonder if its more costly to manage federated or honepot blocking than the bad actors just creating more accounts

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                Chat-PirateB This user is from outside of this forum
                                Chat-PirateB This user is from outside of this forum
                                Chat-Pirate
                                wrote last edited by
                                #37

                                @vkc sorry you have to got through this. Did you notice the content to the server's admin (really asking, not saying you have to)?

                                1 Reply Last reply
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                                • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                  What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

                                  I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

                                  Osma A ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆO This user is from outside of this forum
                                  Osma A ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆO This user is from outside of this forum
                                  Osma A ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #38

                                  Thanks for being here, and thanks for speaking out. This won't ever get better without first acknowledging it's not good.
                                  @vkc

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                    @McNeely I think it's unique to decentralization. If your instance blocked a baddie before they post in my replies, you don't see it and I do. In centralized social media, a mass of reports is enough to ban an account and get their posts mass-deleted. That just can't happen here.

                                    FurbyF This user is from outside of this forum
                                    FurbyF This user is from outside of this forum
                                    Furby
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #39

                                    @vkc @McNeely This highlights a need for more co-ordinated efforts like The Bad Space, but less manual. @Gargron How are those imported ban lists coming along?

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                      I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                      It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                      I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                      Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                      HoboH This user is from outside of this forum
                                      HoboH This user is from outside of this forum
                                      Hobo
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #40

                                      @vkc I really appreciate your work here (as well as on YouTube), and I am glad that people like you contribute the Fediverse. Recently in German Mastodon another woman issued hate speech she is receiving on a regular basis. Itโ€˜s a shame, and itโ€˜s simply against everything the Fediverse was built for. Please feel my/our support!

                                      PS: And I apologize for my remark earlier today, which I made while not having understood well the things you were talking about.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                        I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                        It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                        I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                        Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                        ntheltN This user is from outside of this forum
                                        ntheltN This user is from outside of this forum
                                        nthelt
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #41

                                        @vkc I appreciate you. You're welcome here.

                                        I feel that moderation tools on Fedi is lacking. There should be a way for smaller instances to follow the moderation decisions of larger, more well-moderated instances. Maybe in the form of a community blocked users and instances list that updates in real time, and instances can choose to follow that 100%, or apply whitelists and blacklists to it.

                                        Maybe multiple block lists, like we do with ad blocking.

                                        KelsonK prince lucijaP 2 Replies Last reply
                                        0
                                        • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                          I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                          It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                          I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                          Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                          MissConstrueM This user is from outside of this forum
                                          MissConstrueM This user is from outside of this forum
                                          MissConstrue
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #42

                                          @vkc Im sorry you are experiencing this. Being ovarian presenting and conscious has always been problematic for a certain subset of humans to recognize. How very dare we be autonomous. ๐Ÿซ‚

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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